Friday, September 30, 2011
Again. So many things have happened over the past few months since I have actually last stepped in here.
Perhaps I think I already am too tired to hold everything in. Everything has just been.. too much for me to handle. And I haven't even a person whom I can rant this whole lot of stuff to. So here it shall be.. Since practically no one ever visits this abandoned place.
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
I've come to fall for someone whom
I thought I couldn't love at all.
Strangely when I said those three special words
I really meant it.
From the bottom of my heart.
Somehow I really do want to make this last.
Even though he may not be the most perfect person in the world,
It doesn't matter at all.
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Truly, in a way I am.
I'm curious to see how much you have changed.
How much you are still the same as ever.
About all, how you are doing.
It's entertainment on my part to troll your pathetic life.
This is not only for a single person,
But people whom I find are just 'lesser beings'
They have no substance in a way.
Just meant to be trash thrown outta the window.
Monday, May 9, 2011
Daddy God,
I don't want to hurt another human.
But in the end,
I still did anyway.
Would there be redemption for him..?
Please.
Daddy God,
Forgive me.. Above all,
Forgive him.
Friday, May 6, 2011
As I sit alone,
Away from the world,
Away from everything else.
Just the sound of the piano..
Singing to my soul.
I sincerely thank the wonderful pianist.
I hear him playing all the time.
But today,
Somehow even though he is waiting for me,
I just feel better being alone for most of the bit.
Away from it all.
Daddy God,
I know he has seen much.
I know he knows much.
I know he is in a position to advise people.
But I'm not like the rest. I'm not like him.
I don't listen much.
I would rather go through things and deal with the experience.
Yes, I would rather go through pain than listen to mere words.
For experiences mould a person's character.
Without it, they would never change.
I want to try something out.
He has no idea what it is to be me.
He THINKS he knows what I am thinking.
But does he really know..?
What I am thinking..? What I am feeling..?
People can only sympathise.
Very few can empathise
I believe he can sympathise with some parts of my experiences.
But without walking in my skin,
He'll never know.
Hasn't he already noticed.
How much I yearn to be loved.
Like the way he loves his girlfriend..?
I do want to love in that way.
But for some reason, I just.. Can't.
Friday, April 29, 2011
Hi there.
How are you doing right now..?
I sure haven't heard or seen you for quite some time now.
Though I admit that the sight of you would probably sickens me.
How's your grades..?
How's your life..?
It must be so much different from mine I guess.
Perhaps you have met more fantastic people along the way I guess..?
You should be in your Internship year already by now I suppose..?
So.. Which company did you get attached to..?
Ahh. Enough with the surface questions.
They're just pointless.
I'm having a better life now since we parted.
Found something I really love doing of a different industry from you.
May we never meet again unless we really have to.
But for now. No.
Sometimes, I really envy this person.
To have such a wonderful person beside her.
What I am kinda sad about though,
That it does break my heart not to see them together.
Yet seeing their longing for each other.
I don't know if I would have something like that happen to me.
Or I am just the same as where I am right now.
A workaholic, drowning my own sorrows in endless piles of work.
To make up for my flaws; something I lack in.
Also to forget the things my heart desires.
... Wonderful in a way yes.
For I have never met his kind in quite a little while.
Amusing, sometimes somewhat annoying as well.
He has many flaws. More than I thought.
Doesn't matter. He doesn't belong to me anyway.
---------------------------------
Something struck me today.
"Where are the moral values of this world..?"
What has become of their conscience.
To not be able to tell from right to wrong.
To not be able to consider others other than themselves.
Truly I was really angry.
"You deserved it. Don't say things to appease your own faults."
If you think that what the person did was low, what you said made you even lower.
To the point that you are nothing but chaff; useless.
Good for nothing but to be blown about by the wind.
I stand strong upon my principles. I WILL do what is right.
You don't have the maturity to think further.
Just like your shallow-minded "friends" who support your shallow minded thinking.
Can't think deeper. Can't question further.
Think. Where has their brain and conscience gone to..?
Ask yourself how I gained the position I am in right now.
How did I manage to know people all over the place.
How on earth did I acquaint myself with the one who sits at the top.
Who would listen to me and even say "Hi" when he walks past.
Ask yourself that.
You aren't in any position to give me that bull.
For you are nothing but talk and no action.
You are nothing. You only know so much.
I know more than you.
And will gladly accept your insult and challenge any-time.
Pfft. I would be childish to play your game.
But then again, that's the fun of it isn't it.
You make known to the whole world that I am your target.
Watch your back. Don't think you are safe.
You're defenceless and powerless.
I have a weapon. Sharper than a double-edged sword.
Called words.
If chosen wisely, poison can drip from it.
Making you suffer to the point you don't want to live any more.
YOU BETTER NOT GET ON MY NERVES RIGHT NOW.
Especially when I am in a bad mood.
---------------------------------
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Perhaps I expected too much,
Perhaps I expected too little.
Whichever it is,
I didn't expect something like that.
Perhaps my time is almost up,
But recently I have been catching myself,
More often than not,
Having my brows knitted.
Your actions,
Reactions,
Somehow it just irritates me.
And I have been telling myself that I am over-reacting.
Someone once told me,
"Don't expect too much."
Seems like he was right.
Correction: He was VERY right.
Somehow, my regard for you is dropping.
Really.
You better think of something to salvage it.
Or GAME. OVER.
Hints..?
"Think of others before yourself."
Or you would never learn anything.
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
- Babi Buah Keluak
- Steamed rice
- Mango Sago+aloe vera+sliced strawberry dessert
Would he like it.. DD:
